The Everyday Icon Style Podcast

Episode 183: Your Presence Speaks Before You Do

• Tiffany Howard

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People don't treat you based on your resume. They treat you based on what they see. Before your expertise gets a chance to land, your presence already has, which is why understanding the power of perception is crucial for career advancement.

• Perception is not something to chase, but something to command
• Your "visual business card" is something you show every single day
• You don't need permission to show up like you matter

I invite you to book your free discovery call using the link in the show notes below. We'll talk through whether my Executive Wardrobe Refresh is right for you—a two-hour space to assess what your current wardrobe is signaling and make quiet but powerful adjustments that change how you're perceived professionally.


Speaker 1:

This is the Everyday Icon Style Podcast the space for style-conscious, career-driven women who are ready to look like the next-level version of themselves. Each episode helps you build a wardrobe that reflects not only your executive presence but your real life. With a little bit of guidance, intentional edits and no full-blown transformation required. Let's elevate your style and your authenticity, one outfit at a time. I'm Tiffany, your style coach. Let's elevate your style and your authenticity one outfit at a time. I'm Tiffany, your style coach. Let's get started.

Speaker 1:

Have you ever felt like your role was misread the moment you walk into a room? Then today's conversation is for you, because what you're experiencing isn't imagined, it's optics, and optics matter. So before anyone speaks to you, they automatically assess you Before your expertise gets a chance to land. Your presence already has, and in corporate spaces, especially in roles of support, especially at the executive level, first impressions are often wrapped into assumptions, and assumptions that can keep you boxed in and not allow you to move forward. So this isn't a style episode, it's more of a visibility episode. So I want to talk about perception power and the quiet signals that speak before we even open our mouths. Quiet signals that speak before we even open our mouth, and the first part of that is the power of perception. So let's start with the part that no one wants to say out loud. People don't treat you based on your resume. They treat you based on what they see. So before a conversation so before a conversation, before a credential, there's a quick scan how you stand, your clothing, your expression, your body language. And while it shouldn't be that way, it is, I remember I was an administrative assistant for the WPA territory manager at a bank in Pittsburgh and a gentleman came in to an interview for one of the branches and I go in to let my manager know that he was there and the first thing my manager says to me is hey, what's he look like?

Speaker 1:

And I said, oh, he's all right. Is he dressed nice? Yeah, did he speak to you when you came in? When he came in, yeah, yeah, he was like all right, send him in. Because people will base your assumptions of whether or not you get a job, and this is probably twofold One about the perception of the guy that I got, and number two, exactly how powerful you are in a position. Sometimes we think we don't have power, but we do, and in that moment I actually did, because how I would, how he treated me when he came in and how he looked, and the information that I gave to my manager could have made or break whether or not he got a job, just by that alone. So I want to leave just those two little place, two little tidbits with you.

Speaker 1:

So, but when you're in a room full of people, sometimes, especially if you're in assistant roles we're often mistaken as less than not because of our talent, but because of assumptions tied to how they show up and sometimes tied to the actual roles that society has placed upon them. Now you might look sharp, the calendar might be flawlessly running on autopilot, but if the visual signs read background, then the background is where you will stay. I have had to learn this over and over again. I have credentials, I have the experience more than most, but because my visuals don't match that and my visuals keep me in the background but part of that is also too I've never liked to be seen get attention, all of the things, but not at the time understanding that that can actually hold someone back. Now I'm trying to rectify it and I want to be able to help you so you don't make the same mistakes that I did, because it's a trap when people assume your function based on your finish and the issue isn't how you see yourself, it's how others filter your presence through the lens of hierarchy, familiarity or outdated norms those really haven't caught up yet or haven't really changed. And no one teaches you how to signal credibility without overcompensating. But perception isn't something to chase, it's something to command, and I think sometimes we think we have to. We've been raised especially black women that we have to overcompensate. We have to go get another degree, we gotta go get another certification, we gotta stay five hours late, come in 10 hours early, when we don't have to do that. It's all more about commanding and your presence. So how do optics and opportunities kind of meet?

Speaker 1:

Now there's a subtle cost of being consistently underestimated. Opportunities start to bypass you and pass you by, not because you aren't qualified, but because you weren't even considered for the role. And here's the thing Most women in roles of support and administrative. They don't need to learn anymore, they need to be seen differently and this just isn't for people in support roles. I don't want you to think that, oh, I'm just here for executive assistants at admins and chiefs of staff. No, this is for anybody in corporate America, anybody looking to get to that next level, you have to be seen differently. If you don't, you will always stay where you are or you will always go from one company to another company, to another company. Now, I do not want you to think that this is, that you're supposed to stay somewhere and, you know, get treated any type of way. No, this is all about you, because if you bring all of this together and they still pass you by, then, yeah, it's definitely time to go. So, but before I go on another tangent, let's move on now.

Speaker 1:

This isn't about dressing for the job you want. That advice is old and it's tired. This is about understanding the unspoken systems that shape how influence is perceived, and I will tell you this over and over again. If you sit back and you really think about it, you have seen this in action in play all the time, because in many organizations, decisions are made inside conversations. Impressions formed in elevators or Zoom windows when your presence blends in your name often does too. So what does it look like to take that power back? Not by changing who you are, but by becoming intentional about how you're actually read, and that brings us to reclaiming your visual authority.

Speaker 1:

When you're thinking about your visuals, I want you to think of them as your visual business card. You know, everybody has these nice pretty cards that people used to hand out back in the day, these nice pretty cards that people used to hand out back in the day. Your visual business card is something that you will show every single day, so let's start to reframe and redefine. What put together is because you now get to figure out what that is, and it's not about more effort. It's about being more aligned, and the goal isn't to be noticed for how you look. The goal is to be unmistakably, unmistakable tongue tied here for what you represent.

Speaker 1:

Now. Visual authority means crafting a presence that speaks for you when you don't have the floor and when you're not in a room. It's subtle, it's a consistent color palette, it's tailoring that implies precision, a choice of jewelry that feels deliberate rather than decorative, it's strategic and the very most important thing about it is it's personal. Somehow, somehow, the personal has been taken out of style and it is time to bring it back in. Style is personal. What looks good on me may not look good on you, because I created this for me and now you have to figure out what's personal and create something for you.

Speaker 1:

Now, when your present reflects discernment, people don't ask what does she do? They assume you have weight. We have seen this time and time again. What does she do? She's important. But then you find out that her role might actually be lesser than yours, and that changes how they engage with you, because they see that you mean business and that you're important. This has nothing to do with your title. Now, this isn't about adopting someone else's aesthetic, and I think that's kind of what we've been doing and why everything looks so blah and cookie cutter. It's actually about asking yourself what do I want to be known for, and does my presence reflect that, without any explanation at all.

Speaker 1:

Now, reclaiming your visual authority means choosing presence over polished and intention over imitation, and if that means breaking away from what's expected of your role, then so be it. We're not here to no longer reinforce a system. You're here to quietly rewrite it and they will always remember you for it. So if anything in this conversation felt like it was naming something you've always sensed, that's not accidental at all. I'm here to draw and bring those thoughts and ideas out, and it means that you're ready to shift from being read as helpful or nice to being recognized as essential, and that starts first with clarity, not just with what you wear, but also how you show up. But I'm here for what you wear.

Speaker 1:

So my executive wardrobe refresh was created for this exact moment. It has nothing to do with trends, and we're not going to go shopping and we're not going to create any shopping list, or actually, we're not even going to really clean out your closet, go figure. It's actually a two-hour space to pause, assess what current wardrobe is, what your current wardrobe is signaling, and start making quiet but powerful adjustments that change the way you're read. There's no pressure, there's no overhaul. We just need a space for you to recalibrate with someone who sees you beyond your title and wants to help you walk into this new woman that you're walking into, your new evolution, evolving self, if that's a thing. So I invite you to book your free discovery call using the link in the show notes below of this podcast episode and we'll talk through whether or not this is a right fit and, if it is, I look forward to serving you and making your wardrobe become your reality.

Speaker 1:

So, to conclude, your presence is already saying something. The question is is it saying what you want to say and is it saying the right thing? You don't need to force your way into the spotlight. You just need to make sure you're not visually dimming your own signal. You're not invisible, you're not optional and you don't need permission to show up like you matter. So I hope you enjoyed this episode and I hope you have an amazing rest of your day, stay healthy, stay safe and I will talk to you in the next episode.